Lost Is Pissing Me Off...Mostly In A Good Way Though
I'm a pretty huge fan of Lost. Definitely my favorite current show after Battlestar, and the only one I tune into loyally. I'm also a fan of House, Mother, 30 Rock, The Office, Family Guy, and American Dad has been seriously growing on me, but I usually just catch those on Tivo later. I ignore all other current shows in favor of Scrubs and NewsRadio in syndication.
So last night was the big Lost "cliffhanger." I was pretty disappointed right after I watched it. God knows why, but I really thought there was going to be some huge game-changing revelation, some clue as to the motivations of The Others. Oh yeah, I remember why, it's because the writers specifically said there would be a huge game-changing revelation about the motivations of The Others in this episode. Lying sacks of crap.
After choking down my seething rage at the lack of any new information, however, I decided it was pretty good, with one caveat: why is everyone so stupid? Making people ridiculously stupid is a plot device of bad horror movies. Lost is plenty mysterious enough that they could have their characters act intelligently and still get into Tough Spots.
Exhibit A: Kate and Sawyer don't even try to escape because it is revealed they are on a separate island. WTF? You got on the island somehow, geniuses. Go hijack whatever that means of conveyance was. Or ambush Danny and steal his gun. Try and find Alex. Save Jack. Go investigate what it is you've been building. Orrrrr...have sex in your cage and wait for death.
Exhibit B: Ben goes under the knife with absolutely no insurance. The Others are supposed to be ridiculously smart, right? So Ben's ingenious plan to get Jack to want to fix his spine was to torture everyone for a while? That was awesome and intriguing when I thought the tumor was just part of some grander mind game, but anyway...it turns out it's real. Okay, Ben, so you've got Kate and Sawyer. You've proven you're ruthless and a liar. You're about to knock yourself out and give the man you've been imprisoning several sharp knives. Here's what you do: you bring in Kate and Sawyer behind that little glass window, and you say if anything goes wrong in the surgery, we shoot them both in the head. Or some equivalent threat of retribution. Giving Jack the opportunity to stage his little rebellion was...absurd.
Exhibit C: When Kate and Jack are radioing at the end and Jack tells her to run, Kate just screams "No! No! No!" repeatedly, never telling him why. Okay, you're in a pretty high stress situation, but still, just tell him that you're on a separate island, man! Jack's "Holy Shit We're Completely Screwed" look would have been a way cooler cliffhanger than what they actually pulled anyway. Then he grins/shrugs and instead of going BwwweeEEEEEE the Lost Horn goes bwow bwow bwow bwooooow...
Other than blatant stupidity on both sides though, I decided it was pretty good. For one thing, it had freaking Nathan Fillion. Admittedly he wasn't very badass, but I could feel it rumbling beneath the surface. For another thing, Jack became sweet again. He'd been slipping there for a while, and we certainly need an influx of Awesome following Eko's untimely demise. Kate's flashback was mostly useless, but it was kind of interesting and kept with the whole redemption theme when she decided not to leave Sawyer like she left Captain Malcolm Reynolds. Finally, I was a little annoyed when Locke's big revelation was "open your eyes and look north" until I realized Alcatraz is probably situated north of the main island...oh baby. I can see it now. Kate and Sawyer are on the run, The Others keep closing in, things look grimmer and grimmer until they're backed against the shoreline, surrounded, an impossible situation. There's no escape, no hope remains and suddenly...BwwweeEEEEEE! Locke and Sayid surf in on their huge testicles, propelled by sheer badassery, and proceed to whoop the shit out of everyone with huge-ass manly hunting knives and a side of Jesus Stick. Then Ball and I hug and jump up and down like little girls.
That's right. I just wrote passionately about a TV show. You thought you knew me.
So last night was the big Lost "cliffhanger." I was pretty disappointed right after I watched it. God knows why, but I really thought there was going to be some huge game-changing revelation, some clue as to the motivations of The Others. Oh yeah, I remember why, it's because the writers specifically said there would be a huge game-changing revelation about the motivations of The Others in this episode. Lying sacks of crap.
After choking down my seething rage at the lack of any new information, however, I decided it was pretty good, with one caveat: why is everyone so stupid? Making people ridiculously stupid is a plot device of bad horror movies. Lost is plenty mysterious enough that they could have their characters act intelligently and still get into Tough Spots.
Exhibit A: Kate and Sawyer don't even try to escape because it is revealed they are on a separate island. WTF? You got on the island somehow, geniuses. Go hijack whatever that means of conveyance was. Or ambush Danny and steal his gun. Try and find Alex. Save Jack. Go investigate what it is you've been building. Orrrrr...have sex in your cage and wait for death.
Exhibit B: Ben goes under the knife with absolutely no insurance. The Others are supposed to be ridiculously smart, right? So Ben's ingenious plan to get Jack to want to fix his spine was to torture everyone for a while? That was awesome and intriguing when I thought the tumor was just part of some grander mind game, but anyway...it turns out it's real. Okay, Ben, so you've got Kate and Sawyer. You've proven you're ruthless and a liar. You're about to knock yourself out and give the man you've been imprisoning several sharp knives. Here's what you do: you bring in Kate and Sawyer behind that little glass window, and you say if anything goes wrong in the surgery, we shoot them both in the head. Or some equivalent threat of retribution. Giving Jack the opportunity to stage his little rebellion was...absurd.
Exhibit C: When Kate and Jack are radioing at the end and Jack tells her to run, Kate just screams "No! No! No!" repeatedly, never telling him why. Okay, you're in a pretty high stress situation, but still, just tell him that you're on a separate island, man! Jack's "Holy Shit We're Completely Screwed" look would have been a way cooler cliffhanger than what they actually pulled anyway. Then he grins/shrugs and instead of going BwwweeEEEEEE the Lost Horn goes bwow bwow bwow bwooooow...
Other than blatant stupidity on both sides though, I decided it was pretty good. For one thing, it had freaking Nathan Fillion. Admittedly he wasn't very badass, but I could feel it rumbling beneath the surface. For another thing, Jack became sweet again. He'd been slipping there for a while, and we certainly need an influx of Awesome following Eko's untimely demise. Kate's flashback was mostly useless, but it was kind of interesting and kept with the whole redemption theme when she decided not to leave Sawyer like she left Captain Malcolm Reynolds. Finally, I was a little annoyed when Locke's big revelation was "open your eyes and look north" until I realized Alcatraz is probably situated north of the main island...oh baby. I can see it now. Kate and Sawyer are on the run, The Others keep closing in, things look grimmer and grimmer until they're backed against the shoreline, surrounded, an impossible situation. There's no escape, no hope remains and suddenly...BwwweeEEEEEE! Locke and Sayid surf in on their huge testicles, propelled by sheer badassery, and proceed to whoop the shit out of everyone with huge-ass manly hunting knives and a side of Jesus Stick. Then Ball and I hug and jump up and down like little girls.
That's right. I just wrote passionately about a TV show. You thought you knew me.
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9:30 AM, November 13, 2006
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