Sexy Metal Pants

Jism and I just came up with the best idea ever. And when I say Jism and I, I mean we actually both came up with it at the exact same time, and quite independently of one another. Simultaneous genius. How is it possible, being several states and hundreds of miles away? Well, once you've rubbed bellies with someone, brother, it forms a special bond. A smooth belly bond.

Pre. Crawl. Tailgate. Best idea ever. What's it going to be, like 17 degrees out? Glorious! I can picture it now! It looks a lot like me standing outside in the cold, alone, gnawing on a half frozen bratwurst, listening to the sounds of laughter and revelry coming from my warm, cozy condo, where everyone else is. And I'll be loving it you son of a bitch. Maybe it would be better to wait for Pub Crawl II in June, but what I should do and what I do do have never been particularly well acquainted. Party on!

A parting conundrum: What is worse, the final episode of AD, the Diet Pepsi commercial with Jackie Chan, or famine? Consider your mind blown.