Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Five Things I Want To Buy

There was a time, long ago before I started dating Lizett, that I lived like a king. I had a job that paid too much for too little work and virtually no expenses. I bought 5 iPods. I ate out every night. Sometimes I'd withdrawal thousands of dollars in ones and roll around like a dog.

It's over. I have left a privately funded school and gone public. I have abandoned Mothball subsidized rent for a Big Boy apartment. I have to buy gas. Lizett consumes $950 each week in meat products alone. In short, I can no longer simply spend as if the money will never run out. Here are the ways in which I would buy happiness if I could:

Apple iPhone

Don't tell me this isn't going to live up to the hype. I myself am a bit skeptical of the touch screen keyboard, but in my opinion there is virtually no chance of this thing getting anything less than stellar reviews and widespread adoption. Smart phones are already well established as being indispensably awesome, and apple never fails to blow minds. I would hunt and consume an adorable kitten for the google maps integration alone.

Digital Piano

I played the piano for years growing up, and although I was never nearly so good as I was on the Euph, I wasn't terrible. I tried to fiddle around a little while I was in NC for Babyfest, and it was pretty embarrassing. I can still sight read well enough, and my fingers know where to go, I just can't do it with reasonable speed or coordination. I'd like to get back into it because, unlike the Euph or any of the other brass I've picked up over the years, you can sit down and start playing piano wherever pianos are found.

LCD HDTV

We actually already have an HDTV. Lizett bought an Insignia CRT which has pretty much the best picture quality one can get. In fact, being a 4:3 CRT, for the vast majority of available programming it's probably much more watchable than what I would upgrade to. Still, it's not huge and it's not flat. Why do I care if it's flat? Because. And at 27", that's bumped down to like...24" (?) in 16:9--after living with Mothballvision, there really is no substitute for the 4x life-size pockmarked face of Edward James Olmos.

Wrinkle Free Shirts

As I type I am wearing a blue and white striped wrinkle free button-up that was originally intended to be a birthday present for my father. The sleeves are way too short so I've got to roll them up, but this is pretty much the only button-up I wear anymore because I am too lazy to iron and this is the extent of my wrinkle free selections. After working in the dome for 3+ years, the rest of my wardrobe consists almost entirely of solid button-ups and polos, but since moving to Austin I've grown lazy and have busted out the iron exactly zero times. I don't love looking like slob, however, so some new hassle free gear would be huge. Also I'd love it if my sleeves reached my hands. 15 1/2 35-36.

MacBook

Two Apple products on one five-item list? Suck it, I'm a MacHead. Further, I am a computer guy without a computer. It's embarrassing. I sold my own machine years ago to help finance ring #1, and have been fortunate enough to blunder into work-issued PowerBook G4s since that time. My current state-issued machine, however, is old, clunky, slow, lasts about 20 minutes on battery power and, I swear, appears to have been chewed on by someone's dog. The new MacBooks are cheap, sleek, light, Core 2 Duo, and can run OSX and Windows in parallel--genuinely, I cannot fathom why anyone would buy another machine.

Bonus item: Krispy Kremes. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

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Blogger Lizett! said...
Are these thinly veiled suggestions for birthday presents? Why would you do that to me, you know I'm poor!

On the other hand, Mothball, you should buy at least 4/5 items on the list.

12:40 PM, June 13, 2007  

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Good call Diz....I do need 4/5 of those items. But why stop there? I think I'll buy two of everything and then e-mail Steve a video of me lighting one set on fire while enjoying the other set in the background.....genius.....

1:39 PM, June 13, 2007  

Blogger Goat said...
I'm curious to see how good the iPhone is going to be. It has serious potential. Other than the fact that my work won't allow me to have one because it has a camera, I totally want one. If it doesn't suck, that is. I'm going to let you test it for me, Mal.

And why we're on the subject of Macs, I highly recommend the MacBook. It rocks. I converted last August and I love it. Only complaint is that I should have gotten more memory. This should be closer to the top of your list.

1:52 PM, June 13, 2007  

Blogger Rocky said...
Buck up, Steve-o. This is how the other half lives. Turn Lizett into a vegetarian, buy a hybrid vehicle, steal someone's laptop at the coffee shop using Lizette as a decoy (like the commercial). Cool cellphones are over-rated and porn looks good on any size TV screen, as will a pock-marked Edward James Olmos. Gotta see the brighter side of being poor, you don't have the hassle/worry of your expensive toys being ruined or stolen (like when neighbors/detectives have keys to your front door). You'll get there, buddy, just takes time....and Mothball should buy you some of that stuff for supporting his condo half his college life.

4:03 PM, June 13, 2007  

Blogger ndNips said...
Oh, man, I'm still holding out for the Sub-MacBook.Supersweetasmic.

And as for the piano:

Your school sucks.
Your team sucks.
You suck.
Suck it band boy.

6:22 PM, June 13, 2007  

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Add www.kittycanscratch.com to the list - WHOIS lookup shows it comes available for purchase August 15th.

Think of the fun we could have...

9:15 PM, June 13, 2007  

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