You Norwegian Son Of A Bitch

Well over a month now since that Norwegian bastard yoinked my check card number, and I still have yet to receive a replacement. I hate you so much Norwegian dude. Having typed "Norwegian" into Google Image Search, I have reason to believe he may drive a magic carpet and can be spotted in a froofy feathered turban, so if you see anyone like that you might want to kick him in the grundle. Anyway, it's been a total beeyotch having no ATM access for the past month, and if they don't send me a new card soon I might just implode.

Speaking of criminal masterminds, Lizett has been spreading false rumors that Arrested Development is getting cancelled, even going so far as to hack into TV Guide and CNN to spread her filthy lies. It's not true! It can't be true! Oh God, it is true. I want to cry. Still, we musn't mourn the Bluth family prematurely--instead we should enjoy the time we do have left together to the fullest possible extent. I, for instance, am going to start stalking David Cross, and intend to make sweet love to my television every time I hear Ron Howard's voice.

Kimlinger, Merello, and Ze Cock should be getting in tonight, which was an unnecessarily long way of saying--Beer Time. Navy tomorrow barely warrants mention--Ball says he's still worried, but you're living in the past, man. If Charlie Weis loses to the likes of the Middies, I'll eat my...bicycle, or something.

My Pick:

ND: Bluth Bananas
Navy: Poop Deck