Highlights

Highlights of the weekend include:

• Charlie, inexplicably: spraying beer on Ball's back midstream; spitting beer on Ball's front shortly after; jumping on a chair and humping the wall; throwing a beer can at my nuts
• Ball performing the diarrhea song & dance routine
• Jen belching louder, longer, and more frequently than any woman or man I have ever met
• The uber-sweet bartender who gave us free pitchers
  
• The signs I had planned to swipe but forgot about appearing magically in my room upon my return from the bar
  
• Being invited to participate in a Notre Dame Porno, and earnestly advised not to worry about it coming back to haunt me in my future endeavors because all hardcore scenes would be spliced in from existing adult films